Lastly, the unifying theme of people’s sharing during the proceedings should be honesty. You are putting forward in plain English exactly how you feel about the addict’s downward spiral, taking special care not to convey anger. If you communicate your feelings with honesty, the addict will listen; communicate anger towards the substance abuser and he will shut-off communication, usually resenting you for your attack.

This seemingly unfair and baseless resentment on the part of the addict comes from his own self-hatred, remorse and shame. If it’s gotten to this stage, an alcoholic or drug addict already hates himself more than you ever possibly could. Lashing out on him will only make him release what he constantly feels inside. Conversely, through honest communication, you show him your love, conveying self-worth and respect. Once he feels his life is worth saving, he’s one step closer to treatment and the intervention has been a success.

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